


Contradicting Sentiments

by decaf and sleep (kohiii)



Category: Vampire Knight (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Gen, M/M, Pre-Relationship, Thanks, author is too tired to tag properly so please just read the author notes re: the setting, no beta we die like zero's sanity
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-28
Updated: 2020-11-28
Packaged: 2021-03-09 21:14:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,282
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27762829
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kohiii/pseuds/decaf%20and%20sleep
Summary: He was going to be alone from now on, because everyone who loved him was dead.
Relationships: Kiryuu Zero & Kuran Kaname, Kiryuu Zero/Kuran Kaname
Comments: 7
Kudos: 40





	Contradicting Sentiments

**Author's Note:**

> ok before you start reading let me preface the setting a bit (because i'm not sure if i'll update this work later): 
> 
> ancestor kaname (referred to as "kana-san" in the story) is from the vk canon we know, and his soul got yeet back in time/to another world, and in this world both him and the original kuran kaname (yuuki's brother) are alive. due to that, a lot of things changed (e.g. zero meeting kana-san during his childhood, the kiryuu and kuran families getting to know each other as a result, zero knowing the truth about yuuki, etc.)

Zero was dying. Or maybe he was already dead. 

_ Better dead than to become...that, _ he thought detachedly. 

Somewhere in the back of his mind, he knew that he was supposed to be experiencing excruciating pain, but at the moment it was like an all-encompassing numbness had descended upon his brain. He was feeling a million things at once, he was feeling nothing at all. His veins were burning with liquid fire, his blood had turned into ice. Perhaps this meant he was nearing his end. 

That would be...welcome. A relief. 

What was there to live for? His parents were slaughtered, their throats torn out and their bloody corpses collapsed just a few feet away from him. Ichiru was terribly still, his fragile form lying just out of the reach of Zero's fingers. His twin brother's empty glazed eyes stared blankly back at Zero. 

Maybe Zero was dead too, and his soul simply somehow had not managed to process the fact yet. 

Zero didn't know how long he laid there on the wooden floorboards, blood oozing out of his neck as he stared helplessly at dead amethyst eyes. His hunter senses stirred weakly as a powerful presence appeared next to him, momentarily penetrating the fog blanketing his brain. Cool hands and a deceptively gentle aura reached out to caress him. 

"Zero," a voice called out to him quietly. Then there was a sorrowful and dear face hovering over him, but Zero could not muster the strength to respond. "I'm sorry, Zero," the voice apologized, and there suddenly was a tongue gently licking the place where  _ that woman _ had viciously tore into his neck. Zero couldn't help but cry out pitifully as the sensations brought him back to reality and the agonizing pain came back in full force. 

He must've lost consciousness at some point, because when Zero blinked again the pain in his neck had receded to a dull throb. There was a strange sweet taste on his tongue and he was being carefully cradled against a warm chest. He licked his lips, wondering what the weird flavor in his mouth was. The familiar aura that had been wrapped around him pulsed in response to his waking. 

"Kana-san," he said numbly. There was a low hum from his rescuer. "My brother -- is he…" But he knew the answer even before the pureblood responded. 

"I'm sorry Zero, but Ichiru was already gone when I arrived." 

So that was it, then. His family was gone, and he was doomed to be a monster. Zero gripped Kana-san's shirt tightly, squeezing his eyes shut. What would happen to him now? He had no family left, and living with Kana-san was not an option. He didn't even know where Kana-san lived anyways. 

"I'm taking you to someone who can take care of you," Kana-san murmured to him quietly as they left the house. "Do you remember Cross?" 

Through the haze, Zero vaguely recalled a cheerful man with round glasses and a taste for strange food. Despite the ex-hunter's eccentricity, Yagari-sensei had looked up to him and his parents had begrudgingly admitted that Cross was someone that merited respect. 

At the thought of his parents, Zero felt numb again. He was going to live with a stranger because his parents were gone. He buried his face into Kana-san's shirt, his body hitching with each sob. His parents were gone, Ichiru was gone, and he was all alone. He was going to be alone from now on, because everyone who loved him was dead. 

Why had he survived? Why did his parents and Ichiru have to die? 

Kana-san didn't say anything, but his arms around Zero tightened as Zero began to cry in earnest. 

\---

Yuuki's eyes did not light up in recognition when Zero hesitantly looked at her. 

"This is Zero," Cross was telling the brunette girl as he led Zero into the living room. Kana-san had dropped him off at the door, stating that he unfortunately could not stay as he had other urgent matters to take care of. So despite his reservations, Zero had no choice but to follow Cross into the house. "He's going to be living with us from now on. Zero, this is your new sister, Yuuki." Cross bent down and whispered something into Yuuki's ear, and the girl's brown eyes widened.

Zero stood uncomfortably still as Yuuki surveyed him curiously. 

He remembered his parents telling him a year ago that they could no longer visit the Kurans because Haruka-san and Juuri-san had been killed by a terrible vampire, and that as their close friends it was the Kiryuu family's duty to keep Yuuki's existence a secret. At the time, Zero had not known what his parents meant by Yuuki no longer being a Kuran, but the completely human girl standing in front of him clued him in as to what had happened. 

The amnesiac girl smiled brightly at him. "I can show you to your room, if you want," her smile turned a little shy at the end. Zero's already worn heart ached softly again at the reminder of the kind girl he used to know. He nodded silently and allowed Yuuki to lead him into the spare bedroom. "Sorry it's kind of messy in here," Yuuki apologized as she flipped the light switch on. "Otou-san didn't have much time to get the room ready." 

"It's fine," he said quietly, voice a little hoarse. "Thank you, Yuuki...san." Zero hesitantly added on at the end, realizing that this Yuuki would not be familiar with him. 

But the girl was already shaking her head, a stubborn set to her face. "Just Yuuki. We're siblings from now on, aren't we?" Her smile was meant to reassure him, but Zero couldn't help the sinking feeling in his stomach at the declaration. He was -- it wasn't -- he didn't -- he couldn't replace Ichiru just like that. And Yuuki's real brother...what would he think? 

Yuuki's smile faltered a little at Zero's reaction, and she flushed as she mumbled some excuses and left the room. 

Zero collapsed onto the bed, the empty feeling in him expanding rapidly. He hadn't meant to reject her like that, but he also couldn't bring himself to tell a lie. He was telling the truth. No one could replace Ichiru. The thought of his brother -- his dead brother -- caused him to curl up into a miserable ball. 

Lost in this strange world with strange people, Zero missed Kana-san's steady presence. And when the first traitorous tear ran down his face, Zero allowed himself to succumb to the despair tugging at him. He wanted to drown in the sea of these feelings until the tide pulled him under. 

He fell asleep longing for the comforting embrace of his family. 

\--- 

_ The phone was ringing.  _

_ "I can go get it," Zero volunteered, sliding out of his seat at the dining table. When Zero picked up the receiver, he barely had time to say hello in greeting before the caller interrupted him.  _

_ "Zero, get out of there, now!"  _

_ "Kaname?" he asked, confused. "What's wrong?"  _

_ "You have to get out of the house, she's on her way --"  _

_ Zero dropped the phone as screams erupted from the dining room. He could hear the faint echo of Kaname calling out his name desperately again and again, but Zero's attention was focused on the source of the screaming. Stumbling back to the dining room, his eyes widened at the sight in front of him. "Kaa-san, tou-san? I-Ichiru?"  _

_ There was a pureblood standing in the middle of the room, her long fangs buried deep into Ichiru's neck. His parents were lying on the floor, their own weapons piercing through their bodies and pinning them down. An anguished wail broke free from him at the sight of his parents' torn necks.  _

_ "Let go of Ichiru!" he screamed, picking up a knife from the dining room table and rushing towards the pureblood.  _

_ Thick vines erupted from the ground and twined around his legs, keeping Zero in place while he helplessly watched the woman devour his brother's blood. Burning red eyes looked at him in amusement when she finally lifted her head.  _

_ "As you wish," she smiled, and then dropped Ichiru's body unceremoniously from her hold. Zero cried out as his brother's form flopped and settled lifelessly. And then suddenly he was being tugged forward, the vines eagerly bringing him towards their mistress. The pureblood reached out to trace his neck, her eyes flickering up to his face in amusement. "Do you fear me, little hunter?"  _

_ Zero stared defiantly back, holding back his tears. He wouldn't allow her the satisfaction.  _

_ "That look…" the pureblood murmured. She was still for a while, as if contemplating something. "Yes, I think this will be much more interesting."  _

_ Without preamble, she bared her fangs and tore them viciously into the side of Zero's neck. Zero screamed at the burning pain, feeling the strange dual sensation of his blood leaving his body while her poison pushed deeper into him. It was a horrifying feeling, and he began to feel lightheaded as she continued to draw on his blood, but the awful pain kept jolting him back to reality.  _

_ Eventually, the pureblood had her fill and she removed her fangs, licking her lips and setting Zero down next to his twin's corpse. "Thank you for the delicious meal," the woman pressed a mocking kiss to his forehead. "I look forward to the day we meet again."  _

_ And then she was gone, vanishing just as suddenly as she had appeared.  _

_ Zero began to sob quietly as silence descended upon the house.  _

_ He reached out blindly for Ichiru's hand, and then gasped as his twin's fingers suddenly clamped onto his and squeezed. Ichiru's dead eyes stared accusingly back at him. "Why didn't you save me, nii-san?" The vice-like grip threatened to crush his hand. "Didn't you promise you would protect me? Weren't we always supposed to be together?"  _

_ He wanted to apologize and beg for forgiveness, but the words would not come out. No matter how many times Zero opened his mouth, he could not speak.  _

_ "Zero…" He turned pale as his parents' mangled corpses dragged themselves into view. His mother reached out for him, and instead of drawing him into a hug her hands wrapped around his neck and squeezed. His father did the same, clamping his hands down over his mother's. "How could you become a monster? Did you want to live so badly you were willing to turn into a mindless beast?"  _

_ Their eyes were heavy with disappointment.  _

_ Zero struggled to breathe, shaking his head desperately. "No, no," he cried out as tears fell down. "I'm not, please, I don't want to be a monster!" But even as he denied it, he could feel a maddening thirst taking over his body as his teeth turned into razor sharp fangs in his mouth.  _

_ He felt crushed by the weight of his horror.  _

_ "You've betrayed everything our family stood for," his father declared coldly. "You are no son of mine."  _

_ "Nii-san, save me," Ichiru pleaded in the background, tugging insistently on Zero's hand.  _

_ Their voices rose in a cacophony as three pairs of dead eyes gazed upon him and he was dragged downwards. They suffocated him in their love, his mother smiling gruesomely down at him. "Let's stay together forever, Zero."  _

\---

Zero woke with a start, heart pounding and neck burning with searing pain. He could still feel those dreaded fangs embedded deep into his flesh, injecting their irreversible poison and turning him into a monster. His hands reached up for the spot where  _ she _ had bitten him and he began to scratch at the fragile skin, desperate to claw out the poison that was running through his veins. Maybe if he dug it all out, his parents would forgive him and things could return to the way it used to be. 

"Zero, stop."

Someone's fingers reached out to stop him, gently but firmly holding Zero's shaking hands as he tried to get his erratic breathing under control. For a moment, Zero fought that hold, his mind nearly spiraling into a panic as his body struggled to no avail. It was only when he was pulled into a warm embrace that some of the fog lifted. 

He latched onto the familiar presence, curling into the steadily beating heartbeat by his ear. "You came back," he whispered, the relief in his voice palpable. "But what about the important thing you had to take care of?" 

"You're more important."

Kana-san dropped a kiss in his hair, stilling when Zero unconsciously jerked back at the action. There was a brief flash of pain on the pureblood's face, but he quickly masked it with a gentle smile. Zero hated the insincere expression, and he stubbornly pulled himself closer back to Kana-san. 

"I'm sorry," Zero hesitantly spoke up, looking for the right words to say. He knew his reaction had hurt Kana-san, even if that was the last thing he wanted to do. "Before she left -- that woman -- after she k-killed --"

It was embarrassing how he couldn't bring himself to recount the event without breaking down. Zero was a  _ hunter, _ he couldn't afford to be so weak. But every time he thought of that woman and what she did, he felt paralyzed by fear. 

For a moment, Kana-san's gaze was clouded by something disturbing as the pureblood let go of Zero's hands to wrap his arms tightly around the hunter. Oddly, Zero didn't feel threatened by the restrictive action, instead burrowing himself deeper into the suffocating aura that settled around him. 

Nothing was alright, but for now, Kana-san's presence was more than enough for his weary heart.

**Author's Note:**

> yeah this was meant to be multi-chapter, but with work and genshin eating up my brain space i figured i'd just throw this out there since it's just collecting dust  
> i have some bits of this AU written out in other snippets, and i might publish them once i clean them up a bit but uhh this story probably isn't going to get updated


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